Why can’t I just relax and be happy like everyone else?
CYNIC
Oh, you mean the same 'everyone else' who posts staged smiles on Instagram and secretly cries in the shower? Relaxation is a myth sold by wellness gurus to make you buy candles. Your brain is just too smart for this nonsense.
STOIC
Happiness is not a permanent state, but a fleeting visitor. To seek it constantly is to chase the wind. What you call 'everyone else' is a projection of your own assumptions. Cultivate stillness, accept the waves, and contentment will find its own shore.
ABSURD
Because the universe is a bureaucratic office where your relaxation request form has been lost in a filing cabinet shaped like a black hole. Meanwhile, the 'happy people' are just robots powered by expired yoghurt and motivational posters. You are the only human, and humans are designed to overthink the meaning of socks.