I envy people who can cry. I forgot how.
CYNIC
Oh, great, another person romanticizing tears like they're a premium feature. You forgot how to cry? Congratulations, you've unlocked the advanced level of emotional constipation. Want a medal or just a tissue you won't use?
STOIC
Crying is not a skill to remember but a release you've learned to suppress. The tears are still there, waiting beneath the stillness. You do not need to force them; you need to stop forbidding them.
ABSURD
You envy people who can cry? Meanwhile, I once saw a man weep over a misplaced sock while a thunderstorm cried on his behalf. Maybe your tears took a vacation to Bermuda and forgot to send a postcard. Try asking your lacrimal glands for a refund.